Counselling, support and information for all relationships 

Help With Sex & Sex Addiction 

Help With Sex & Sex Addiction 

Sex therapy 

Sex therapy 

 
All couples go through periods where they don’t have the time or energy for regular sex. 
 
If this has become the norm and you would like to rediscover your sex life, then Relate's sex therapy programme could be right for you. 
 
Sex is a very personal thing, and talking about it can be embarrassing. But talking is often the best thing you can do to improve your sex life. 
 
All couples go through phases where they don’t have the time or energy for regular sex. It’s natural to want better sex and sometimes there are specific psychological or medical reasons for your difficulties. 
 
 
Relate Sex Therapists are difficult to shock, and are trained in highly effective ways of tackling many issues in a safe and friendly environment. They will help you explore the reasons behind the problem and look at ways of addressing it. 
 
 
Our psychosexual therapy service is highly successful, with 93% of both men and women who completed treatment reporting a significant improvement in their sexual relationship. 
 

 Don’t be embarrassed about it – talk to us.  

 Don’t be embarrassed about it – talk to us.  

Relate has helped thousands of people re-discover a satisfying sex life. So now you can do more than just hope things will change. 
 
For more information call us on 0115 958 4278 or email us recovery@relate-nottingham.org.uk 

 Sex & Porn Addiction  

 Sex & Porn Addiction  

Find out how to recognise addiction and what to do if you think you or your partner may have a problem. 
 
 
 
 

What is sex addiction? 

What is sex addiction? 

 
Sex addiction is a term that describes any sexual behaviour that feels ‘out of control’. 
 
It’s not the behaviour itself that defines it as an addiction but rather the dependency on it to numb out negative emotions and difficult experiences. 
 
As with all addictions, most people with sex addiction will have tried to stop or limit their behaviour on many occasions – but in spite of continuing harmful consequences to self and others, they can’t reliably stay stopped. 
 
 

 For example:  

Compulsive masturbation 
Compulsive use of pornography 
Having multiple, ongoing affairs 
Exhibitionism 
Fetishes 
Dangerous sexual practices 
Prostitution 
Anonymous sex 
Voyeurism 
Telephone sex 
Chat room/online sex 
Partner sex 
Illegal sexual practices 
Compulsive masturbation 
Compulsive use of pornography 
Having multiple, ongoing affairs 
Exhibitionism 
Fetishes 
Dangerous sexual practices 
Prostitution 
Anonymous sex 
Voyeurism 
Telephone sex 
Chat room/online sex 
Partner sex 
Illegal sexual practices 
 
 

What are the issues for partners?  

What are the issues for partners?  

Finding out that your partner is a sex or pornography addict is devastating for most partners. Not only do partners experience the betrayal and deceit that often accompanies an affair, but they may also have to face a future with a partner living in recovery from addiction. 
 
Most partners have absolutely no idea that their partner is an addict until it is either disclosed or discovered, so shock is the first and most intense emotion. Along with that are feelings of anger, shame, self-doubt, loss and fear. 
 
 

How do you know if your partner is a sex addict?  

It’s impossible to know if someone is a sex addict without a thorough assessment with a sex therapist, but warning signs include increasing secrecy, isolation, moodiness and avoidance of couple, family and social responsibilities. There may be increased irritability, tiredness, depression and anxiety and some couples notice an impact on their sex life such as erectile difficulties or avoiding sex. But do remember there are many explanations for all of these behaviours so it’s important not to jump to conclusions. 
 
However, if you know your partner has struggled with addictions in the past and you also know that they use pornography, it may be worth asking if their pornography use has increased or become a problem for them. 
 
 

What should you do if you think you or your partner has a problem?  

First and foremost you need to talk to each other. Many people with addiction go through a period of denial before they feel able to accept that the problem really is an addiction that has got out of control. If you or your partner accepts that there is a problem then you need to find help for both of you. 
 
Talk to us at Relate. Our experienced counsellors will undertake an initial assessment to see if you or your partner would benefit from specialist sex addiction help. For most people suffering from sex or porn addiction, this is the best course of action. 
 
You can ask about getting help and support for yourself either through individual counselling or a group support programme. 
As well as your local Relate Centre, you can find specialist sex addiction help for addicts and partners through the Association for the Treatment of Sex Addiction & Compulsivity. 
If your partner doesn’t accept, or believe, that they have a problem then you can still reach out for help and support for yourself. 
 
The problem may not be addiction, but if it’s something that’s affecting your happiness then you can still benefit from talking to a counsellor about how you can move forward. 
 

 How we can help  

If you’re worried about your sex life, there are various ways we can help. 
 
Talk to us about your concerns or questions on 0115 958 4278 
 
Or email us in confidence recovery@relate-nottingham.org.uk 
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